A black year and a colorful life

In wealthy Chinese cities, most of the children come from families with only one child; therefore, many of them are adored by their parents and grandparents, and treated as “little emperors”, or “little princesses”. At first, I used to be my parents’ favorite, but many Chinese parents, and my father among them, dream to have a son, so the year, when my baby brother was born, turned out to be a black year for me.

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When I completed my second year at school, my parents told me that I had to transfer to another junior high school, where my cousin was studying, and that mother would go to study in a foreign country, and I would live in my cousin’s house. Actually, I was completely shocked and frustrated with such news, but I could not argue with my parents. When I moved to my cousin’s house, I felt really lonely, as not only were we strangers with her, but also I could not see my mother. I was perplexed when my I could not reach my mother on the phone, hearing all the time that the dialed number was incorrect; and different explanations, I was hearing from people around me, were making me even more confused.  Moreover, my aunt, who was my cousin’s mother, was an arrogant and snobbish woman, who did not treat me well, buying books and clothes only for her child, and always giving me a cold shoulder when I tried to talk to her or ask her something. Whenever I tried to ask for her help with my homework, I received the same dismissive reply: “Wait till I check my daughter’s assignment first, then I will help you if I am free”. I waited for her until very late in the night, but she would not come, and eventually, such attitude cooled off my ardor. My cousin’s family always spent their weekends and free time together without including me into any activities, and as I thought I depended on them at that time and was desperately trying to make them like me, I cried myself to sleep every night and felt absolutely miserable. Sometimes, my friends would ask me, “Did your mother go away to give birth to a son?” I was also confused and afraid that would happen without me knowing about it. The most unforgivable was that no one wanted to tell me the truth: my grandmother told me my mother went away to America; my aunt said it was Australia, and my father claimed she went to Canada. I did not believe their words and wanted to find out the truth on my own. One day I went to my parents’ house, and in my parents’ room, I found a gynecology textbook and a lot of different books about having a baby. I burst into tears, being truly devastated, as I was thinking everyone in my family was lying to me. I was sure I was a child nobody would love and care about in the future.

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It was a wonderful feeling, when I first saw my little baby brother. His lovely face was the first gift he received from God in his life. At the time, I could not show my love for him, because I could not tolerate the thought that I would have to share everything with the baby, and most importantly, my parents’ love. At first, I was really jealous, because everyone was bustling over my baby brother. I acted really selfishly then, trying to be mean to the baby and making him cry. However, everything changed one year later when I heard him calling me “sister” with his beautiful voice. I could not stop myself from loving him with all my heart. I was ashamed of my egoistic behavior, and humiliated that I was so jealous.

Everything changed in our family when my brother was born: he filled our home with joy and laughter, and brought luck to my parents, as upon hearing that my mother was pregnant with a boy, my father mustered enough courage to undertake the real-estate business, he had been long dreaming about: he bought an expensive land allotment which soon brought him a lot of money. I know that I would not be able to come to America if I did not have my brother, as my parents would be too lonely without me. I miss my brother a lot now; I miss his big eyes, cute smile, and sweet voice.

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 A family that has both son and daughter is truly happy, as both of them will take care of each other and their parents when they grow up. I do not like going back to the memories of the black stripe that I experienced, I am much happier these days. I have completely changed my opinion, and now, I am sure it is really good for the family to have two or even more children.

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