In most families, people usually hang their photographs of their happy moments on their walls so that they could look at them whenever they want. Personally, I find this weird, and I prefer attaching them in my photo album. However, there is one photo that I like the most that was taken when I was two and half years old. This photo consists of me and my parents, and brings sad memories from my childhood whenever I see it. Nevertheless, this photograph is unique because it depicts the people whom I love the most one of them is my father whom I adore. My father is about 1.7 meters tall, a little fat, round and fat- faced with small round eyes. By seeing this photo, I remember the things I went through before I became morally responsible.
Now that I am older and I understand my father’s love and that he would do everything to make me happy. As a kid it was hard to understand the sacrifices my dad had to bear for me; however, now that I understand, I can only say that my dad is the best father and friend I have ever had.
I am the only child in our family. This was the result of the introduction of the one-child policy by the government of China. This has made me enjoy the privileges of being the only child in a family. When I was young, every time I made a mistake, my dad threatened me by saying that he would get me a younger brother or sister. I always feared being dethroned because this would mean that the love that my parents gave to me would consequently be shared among the other younger siblings that we would have. I could always break down into tears whenever I heard this from my dad and decisively refuted his idea.
As sweet as he is, my father never hesitated to scold me whenever I disobeyed him, or done something wrong. He could always play with me childhood games whenever I could not find mates in the neighborhood. He was such a caring dad. I loved it when he escorted me on my way to school, during my kindergarten studies. Every time I was with him, I felt confident, and I always did the right things because I was not pressured by my peers. On the other hand, he loved it when I could do all things in the right way.
My father decided to take me to a boarding school for my primary education. Though, my mother disagreed with the idea my father insisted, but there were no other options. This was because they were too busy to take care of me. They were both working at government firms, and they could not devote themselves to me. Moreover, I was allowed to go home twice a month, and my parents visited me once a week. In addition to this, my father used to call me at least once in two days. I remember how he brought me gifts and food; I truly enjoyed my childhood days.
The most significant change in my life took place when I was four years old. The intimate relationship between my father and I never lasted for many years. A trivial breakdown of understanding of each other arose one day when we had gone for a Labor Day celebration. It was on 1st May on Saturday. My parents took me to the mountain to have fun together with other children. There was children’s playground at the feet of the mountain. The day seemed unusually busy with millions of people in the streets and others on the playing ground. Though my parents have warned me not to get out of the place they had left me so that they could look for me easily, but I decided to turn a deaf ear. We were having fun with some friends I had acquainted with on the playground. So my friends and I decided to go to the other side of the mountain. We were intensely curious and I could not understand why my parents could be so mean that they did not allow me to explore like other children. The other group went to the town to witness what was happening there. As soon as we left the place that my parents had left me, we got lost and could not retrieve our way back. It took my parents five hours to locate where I was. There was a great multitude that hindered their endeavor in finding me.
I finally spotted my father trying to pursue his way through the multitude. I could see sweat rolling down his cheeks as he attempted to seek for his lost daughter. I ran towards him and he was so delighted having found me. He took a huge sigh and a deep breath of relief that showed a sign of happiness after a long struggle. He held my shoulders and kept on telling me that I should never worry. However, the first thing came up into my mind was that they wanted to abandon me. They do not love me anymore. His love for years was shadowed by hatred at due to the events that took place at that time.
The relationship between my father and I was hitherto compromised from that day. I thought that because of the stroke that I had received from my father, as well as the scold from my mother, they would not love me like before. Therefore, I created a barrier again because I took my parents actions as a sign of hatred for me. A glass barrier and I were present between my parents for a long time. Though we could talk in the normal way, I kept within myself that they did not love me honestly. For instance, once when my father visited me at school, he told me that I should work hard and that he loved me exceedingly. I refused and went ahead to tell him that I did not want him to visit me again in school. This attracted a lot of negativity from my father. He was always hard working and made sure that all he worked for was for my own benefit. The gap between my parents and I widen as time went by. I never risked telling my parents directly about my reactions to them at specific instances.
I only came to realize later how my parents loved me, especially my dad when I was in the senior school. I could not again mistake my parents’ love with hatred. I always considered the circumstances of the Labor Day as my turning point towards positive thinking. Every tear that I shed on remembering that day never signifies a sign of sorrow or regret but a sign of transformation.
My father is one of the important people in my life, thanks to him I have learnt many things that helped me build my personality. Where different people may perceive the sharing of one’s emotions and wishes as being weak or vulnerable, I normally did this with my father, not on a single occasion but severally. He has certainly helped me to know more, that I would not have known if he was not my father. No other force or challenge could ever convince me to believe otherwise. It was written in my memory with permanent ink that could not be erased. The more I opened up to my father, the more chances of growing better I got.
I consider that my father’s love is multifaceted. His love to me was more of a friend than a dad. The one on one tutoring concerning life that he used to give me was enough evidence that he wanted me to be better than anybody else including himself. He could even afford not to be modest which is highly appraised in China, for my own sake. All his struggle could, however, compromise his health due to lack of work and life balance but all was for my sake. This was one of the greatest happiness that I had ever experienced in life. Beyond being a parental figure, I could connect emotionally and at a personal level to my father, share my deepest fears or worries with him, have meaningful discussions and he will always help me to make life decisions. This was, however, rooted to the spot of both of our hearts as I grew up.