Relationships are very significant in our modern day life. People relate as siblings, friends and even as couples. The book Becoming Partners: Marriage and its Alternatives is a classic book explaining the nature of relationships and how they are restructured within marriage life. The relationship between a man and a woman is something that has been widely studied especially before and after marrying. Such kind of a relationship is always filled with commitments, experiments, ecstatic periods, dull plateaus and even tragedies. In this paper we will analyze the above book by Carl Rogers and understand the nature of the relationships in marriage.
Becoming Partners Marriage and Its Alternatives
This book has been able to present a number of interviews with the very ordinary people who have been facing a number of problems in their relationships. That being the case, the author has succinctly presented rational ideas and experimentations with new marriages and how such relationship determines the fate of the union (Rogers, 1973). Having conducted such experimentations, the text has been able to present major challenges faced in marriage partnerships. There have been continued explanations regarding the real lessons learned from therapy and life. Basically, everything discussed in the text is applicable to everybody's life.
In order to succeed in marriage and similar forms of relationships, there will always be the need to seek expert advice especially from humanistic psychologists. Such a person will help in crafting and empathetic approach to address the faced issues in the most appropriate manner (Rogers, 1973). This will be the rightful approach towards addressing the major problems and issues faced in the marriage life. This is because the relationship must bring new emotional and psychological problems which have to be addressed in the best way possible. The most important argument is that marriage life is inevitable and therefore there would be the need to be alert and know how the problems faced can be solved (Rogers, 1973).
The author notes, "Marriage and especially the nuclear family constitutes entirely of a failing institution; it is a failing approach to life (Rogers, 1973, p. 46)." Looking at this quotation from the text, we agree that the author believes strongly that the marriage life especially with the nuclear family is something which is deemed to fail. This means that, if precautions are not taken, the two individuals will make life for one another hard and also fail to realize their own dreams and goals in their lives. That being the case, it will be something necessary for the individuals in marriage to come up with new ways of making sure their institution does not fail (Rogers, 1973). This is why a counselor would be needed to make sure such individuals have been in a position of approaching life from the best dimension and by so doing be in a position of realizing their potentials.
The author also says: "such nuclear families have never been successful. That being the case, laboratories, explorations into all possible new approaches, and avoidance of repeating the past failures should be exercised in order to make such relationships successful (Rogers, 1973, p. 78)." What this argument means is that we would be needed to come up with better approaches and ways to make sure all the problems faced in our present marriages have been addressed accordingly. This calls for new kind of thinking in order to ensure the very best has been achieved. The fact of the matter is that our modern relationships will fail if most of the challenges faced are not addressed intelligently.
According to the author, "currently it has been becoming very clear that the woman-man relationship is something which will always have permanence only to the very degree to which it will be able to satisfy the physical, emotional, intellectual, and psychological needs of the partners (Rogers, 1973, p. 138)." Looking at this explanation, we will agree that a new kind of relationship between a woman and a man will succeed whenever both the parties are willing to satisfy one another. This can only be achieved by making sure the psychological, physical, financial, emotional and spiritual needs of every individual has been addressed and promoted by the other. This is something very critical if modern marriages and relationships are to survive.
For instance, what we learn from the book is that future marriages will even be more demanding and challenging. This is because more and more needs continue to arise. Different people continue to develop different needs and expectations from marriage and therefore the best thing is to make sure every relationship has been understood and bred well. This will make sure some minor problems and issues that may be faced in the future are solved in an effective manner. However, as more rights and obligations continue to be given to women, the author believes strongly that modern families will be more stable because of the currently established marriage order (Rogers, 1973).
As well, future partners will be demanding many things from their lovers or marriage partners. That being the case, there will be the need to make sure every kind of issue or problem faced in the relationship has been solved in the best way possible. The author of this text has therefore been able to establish how modern (and future) relationships and marriages will be more demanding, and how each and every individual will be expecting much from the partner (Rogers, 1973). This kind of understanding is appropriate because it will help in addressing the future problems which may arise in relationships.
From the book, it is notable that the author gives supportive mechanisms to make sure young people have been equipped for the long journey in marriage (Rogers, 1973). This will help in addressing all possible problems and also pioneer positive-oriented marriages whereby all forms of challenges can be easily solved by the individuals themselves. This has been offered by clearly presenting the major arguments and views given by the interviews. The information gained is from individuals who have been there in marriage. The advice they offer to the reader is therefore useful for any other person who is about to get married.
The above book by Carl Rogers is therefore a useful book because it makes it possible for people to address the major issues faced in their marriages. The information and judgments given by individuals who have been in marriage makes it possible to make informed decisions about relationships and understand how the problems can be solved. The book is therefore appropriately presented and offers supportive information for all individuals in specific forms of relationships (Rogers, 1973). The use of the ideas presented can thus help in establishment of successful and most convenient relationships whereby every problem is addressed effectively, and every issue is solved accordingly. This will be the rightful approach towards long lasting and happy marriages especially in our current time.